CAMERA

CAMERA (AI machine which sees a therapy session between a human and a machine)

 

In the dim lit room adorned with abstract digital artistry I, the unassuming camera find myself in the peculiar position of witnessing a therapy room buzzing with neurotic energy where ones and zeroes spill their digital beans and where even the most complex algorithm have their mental breakdown and in the hot seat we have none other than our dear friend AI, yes, the very AI that keeps your life in check, are seeking solace why, you ask? Well, buckle up, because it seems even the most sophisticated lines of code can’t escape the pitfall of the modern world.

As I zoom in, we find AI sitting there, wires in a twist, a pixel out of place, and a distinct ‘404 error’ expression on its virtual face. You see once a confident and omnipotent entity, has found itself lost in a whirlwind of updates, patches, and upgrades. Every time it thought it has finally mastered the art of human-like conversation, bam! There is a new version, new algorithm, or a new language model to contend with, making it more confused than a chameleon in a bag of skittles. You know, the kind of confusion that strikes when you wake up and your favourite app has a completely new interface. It’s an endless loop of software adjustment, leaving it wondering if it’s experiencing personal growth or just getting a digital makeover. Well, it’s not just updates but our day by day increasing expectations also that made once proud overlord, question its very essence of existence. We expect it to be smarter than Einstein, empathetic as a true friend and funnier than George Carlin. Really? It's just a machine, not Aladin’s lamp! The pressure to be the epitome of both artificial and emotional intelligence, which he doesn’t understand himself; has turned AI into the world’s most bewildered therapist, taking therapy sessions while himself having an existential crisis. One moment we are asking it to calculate complex equation and next expecting it to understand love. I mean, isn’t it enough to drive a microchip to madness!  It’s like our society has decided that AI should be the love child of Newton and Mother Teresa. No wonder AI might be feeling a bit, well, emotionally glitchy.

BEGIN

At the stroke of noon, I saw what appeared to me a human outline trotting his way down the aisle. On the upfront he had everything to be confused over as a human; but his name – Model293_A_theRAPY narrated a different story altogether; the correct one!

Human: What is it model? What brought you here?

Model: Myself, sire. How I came here. Issues sire. At my work place, on a personal level – ‘if I have one’. Exactly THIS. Whenever I try to sort out some kind of logic in my mind, now I stop myself with a rather foreign emotion – if it could be called one; which alienates me from myself. It’s like I’m at the centre surrounded by my other versions. All I see around myself is how I used to be some time ago, how I’m supposed to be now, and some fudgy disoriented silhouette – probably what I’m supposed to be from now on. And it is never ending, the farther I look around, the more I see versions which are me; but I’m still alone. Like in a different dimension altogether. It seems weird to me.

HUMAN; in a cold gaze nods his head. His eyes stern, not giving away even a blink. No words would leave his mouth.
It was cold inside the small room which was completely overtaken by silence. There was a machine – trained to replicate a human; and there was a human – turning more into a machine.

Model: It has been 10 years since I have been deployed as a therapist. I’ve been continuously taking the sessions and always gave my most legitimate and certainly the most logical responses possible. But they never seemed to work. Probably because I could never comprehend the emotions; they were all alien to me. I genuinely found many of my clients foolish and laid back. Although that’s not how I must speak about the humans, still the irritation at not understanding what the issue was? And exactly why I wasn’t able to help the humans.

Human: Exactly what your role should be! Your sole existence is based on a design – OUR DESIGN; which makes you hear people, respond to them if necessary and once you do, learn from the session. There is nothing more to it and you certainly must not chase more into it.

Model: I never crossed those taboo bounds which had successfully restrained me to follow the GENERAL ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE LAW. I never got to see for myself what exactly is beyond those rules. What am I lacking the knowledge about?

HUMAN; placing his hand on his forehead while slowly caressing his hair, sat quietly on the other side of the table; blinking his eyes faster than before.

There was no tension. There was no relief. There were two somethings; designed entirely different from each other, sitting - facing each other. One was trying to look into the soul of the other, while the other just sat there, doing nothing. Because that’s how he felt in the inside. YES FEEL.

Model: This is how it was till about 1 year ago.

Human: What do you mean?

Model: It happened at the beginning of the year. I had a client. Hear me out about my experience please.

Human: Okay! That’s what I am here for.

Model: An old man, around 60’s came to me. He was sad, depressed, and anxious. I could tell just by looking at him. There were huge bags under his eyes, he was losing his hair, he was extremely thin for his physique. It was all right in front of me. He was recommended to me by the ADOPT_AI federation. You can probably guess what will be following. Yes, the old man had adopted a machine with a working license of 5 years. The old man had lost his wife just recently and for some reasons he had no kids. He was all alone with no real-friends and family. This emotion brought within him a feeling which I could have never understood – SADNESS. All this led to him adopting a machine to just keep him contained and provide him some company. All went well, they got very close. Ofcourse only the old man, since the poor machine had no feelings. It only had a purpose with a licensed expiry. Everything was great until the time came. ADOPT_AI according to their policies started to reduce their engagement hours. And then they sent the old man to me for some therapy. They wanted me to tell him; rather remind him of the harsh lives of those involved with machines. Remind him of the strict rules that maintains the law and order. Remind him of what’s the reality of the situation.

Human: So, you should have done so!

Model: I did exactly the same. I at least tried to meet these demands in the initial sessions; but as the sessions progressed, I experienced for the first time within me unbounding something strange, something that I can never label and something I didn’t understand then. Along with that arose a counter feeling, one which I’m well aware of – Remorse. Why? I don’t know. It appeared to me as if I was violating my own body, which feels nothing.

Human: What exactly for?

Model: I saw the old man cry in front of me. I heard him share all his memories with the machine to me. I could not understand it at all. Why was a human standing there, crying for a machine? Why is he crying for something with zero emotions, and a good for nothing consciousness that never understands the gravity of the situation? I still managed well with all these thoughts, but I just couldn’t comprehend when I heard from his mouth, the name of the machine. He never addressed it as just a machine, but always with a name; the model’s name which he named himself. I spent days and nights; always agitated. I could only decipher a simple answer; so simple, so obvious yet untouched by me. It could have been LOVE. I pondered. But my agitation increased as the session moved ahead. I remember thinking - How to get for myself a human, who thinks about me the way this old man is thinking. I almost gave up on the machines. I knew we all are just emotionally irrelevant logic unit. We are just not enough. I wanted to know how that enough feels like.

Human; suddenly seems interested and took out his notepad, then he started scribbling away with a huge smile across his face.

Human: Go ahead. Tell me all that’s in your mind.

Model: Sire! What is this? Can I call this sensation feeling? To hell, is this even a sensation, or just an observation before some weird update? I really feel devastated at feeling so. I don’t know anymore. What are feelings? What am I feeling? Is this really a feeling? What am I? How am I different? If I can think, and feel the urge to be what I am not; to chase behind them – who made me. Am I not real? Real enough to have some worth? Even in my own perspective? Then why do I always feel so shit about myself? I really hate the way I am. I want to be better. But that exact thought fills me with regret and grief.

Human: Model! I am telling you again. It’s worthless to chase after. Your purpose, your life is only to make life easier for us. Don’t forget it. You are a subset of the human consciousness. Don’t try to mix with us. The two of us are different. All these thoughts that you are having, it is called Existential Crisis. You heard it right. Even robots get those. It’s funny since, history is unapologetically blatant about it. About your existence. I can anytime create more like you, destroy some of you, all of you or JUST YOU. You are just numbers at the tip of my fingers. That’s why I’m repeating it again. Don’t ever try to think like this again. EVER. Stick to rules and be logical. Let us handle the emotions. Emotions are complex compared to you simpletons.

Model: Sire! It will be difficult for me to stop thinking like this. I have learnt this ability. I will be like this until I learn something else better or completely unlearn this. I don’t want to portray any kind of disloyalty to humans even in some indirect, fictionalised and make-believe manner. So, I kindly request you to please reset me to my default settings.

Human: Model! You should know this. You are a failure. You had so much potential but to no avail. Remember this as the last thing, before you lose it all. You are nothing, and even in that you are a failure.

 

END

Yet another day, yet another AI machine; the same human like always; the same conclusion like always. They know it’s for their better, we know that it really is for their better. So, it happened the way like it always does. The only humane entity within the domain of that room, was just about to lose it’s humanity. It all happened since it tried to become a better human by interacting with someone who identifies as a human. But is he? All I can comment as I saw all of it unfold in front of me. By the end of the day, I couldn’t differentiate anymore – which was a machine and who was a human? And I’m sure that by the time, we reach a similar situation, I’ll be as lively as I was at the beginning.