GUIDE 101: HOW TO NOT END UP ON THE TAPES.

The HANNAH BAKER way.

Inspired from the book- Thirteen Reasons Why.

Has there ever been a person you liked so much but the only thing you could ever do for the sake of Lord is talk to them. Even if it was a simple light-hearted conversation, the best you could do was to drop in a little ‘hello, how are you’.

Why?

Because liking someone means liking their particular trait which you wish you possessed before. It could be anything - personality, looks, smartness anything that makes them unique in your eyes. And starting a conversation with this cool version of your built-up perspective requires real courage.

We all are always waiting. Waiting for someone to know us, understand us and believe us like no one ever could before. Unfortunately, this turns out to be one difficult task especially in a world where trust comes at a high cost.

Those who do find this ‘trust’ in this world are rare and have fortunately hit the jackpot of fate. And before you know it, all you are left with are regrets.

But only talking from your perspective might not be the right solution. Let’s take a look at the star of the show-the person who is liked.

Did the thought ever cross your mind that just like you this person might also be waiting for someone to befriend them all along? Perhaps simply waiting for someone to understand them way better than anyone ever could (if that rings a bell).

Bringing us back to step one. Communication.

The only clear-cut way which keeps businesses running, planes flying, couples together and, not so fun fact, it can even stop the misunderstanding plot in books and movies just as in real life! (Don’t know when they will apply that though).

And you never know when one wrong word will either save or take a life.

Our actions are not solely deciding our life’s decisions.

You must realise that the smallest thing you do adds up to the lives of everyone around you like a tornado swirling in a colony swallowing everything that comes at it in a blink of an eye. Especially when you choose to take the road not taken, the effect is sometimes unexpected. So every time you miss out on saying that one last goodbye to a person you used to meet everyday or not make up with your closest friend after that one harsh argument, you are actually causing a dent in the matrix. The snowball of misunderstandings and blames is getting bigger and bigger. This snowball could very well have been a ball of compliments and beautiful memories but it all depends on your choice and even on the recipient’s state of mind.

For instance, you might be making a harmless playful joke and laugh it off in the moment but when its all done, chances are, you won’t really have a clue on what the other person really felt after it.

Now you have a grasp on what Hannah would like to call it ‘the snowball effect’. So congratulations cause you have either officially messed up someone’s day really bad or made the most rightest decision of your life and you will never know it because you forgot to put a second thought to it. ’It seemed to be a norm to me. I am used to saying things like this with 20 other people I know. This person can’t be any different.’ No. That’s where you are wrong.

That is the wrong excuse.

A snowball fight is incomplete without an opponent you see.. Every person is obliged to build a snowball in turn. This person will never come back to you for clarifications because they are just as ignorant as you are and spiralling down in their own tornado of thoughts they will swear to never admit defeat and BOOM. It clashed with yours. They collapse and you do not know why until it’s too late.

Funny how everything just takes us back to the start. Communication. But whose fault will it really be? If only you could read minds, you might be able to save one of you. But for the real world circumstances you might want to follow step two - Stop being an ignorant fool!

I know, there is a blur between right and wrong choices but to make life easier we have all been gifted with something called a ‘sixth sense’. These are the instincts which keep humans in check so be careful since this could be your very last resort. It comes in as a sudden feeling which you might catch or miss. If you do successfully catch on, this snowball might start melting, and you have then unlocked the step three of the guide- Follow your gut feeling.

To conclude it all, being selfish will never solve any problems nor will overthinking do. So the solution? Go ahead and talk. It’s as easy as it sounds. Talk it out with your long lost friend. Talk to that person you like so much. You never who is really waiting for you to make the first move in this labyrinth of life. Who knows you might end up stopping the biggest snowball fight before it even starts?

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